Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Lil Wayne Needs a Doctor

Sometimes I wonder what it's like when Lil Wayne goes to the doctor...

Dr. Tucker: Hello there, Mr. Lil Wayne.

Weezy: Hello Doctor Tucker, hey, hi, how ya dern?

Dr. Tucker: Fantastic. So what's the problem? Feeling sick?

Weezy: Doctor Tucker, I'm ill. Not sick.

Tucker: Well what do you think is wrong?

Weezy: Like a venereal disease or a menstrual bleed.

Tucker: Well we can probably rule out that second one. Could be the first one though. You coulda got it from that Tammy girl. Are you still together?

Weezy: Nah, I couldn't blame Tammy.

Dr. Tucker: Okay then, have you been running a fever?

Weezy: I'm like Nevada in the middle of the summer.

Dr. Tucker: That sounds pretty bad. Lemme try something. I'm gonna press hard on you here and then again on your other side. You tell me how bad it hurts on a scale of 1 to 1 milllion.

Weezy: A million here, a million there!!

Dr. Tucker:
Maybe you should try settling down some. You party a lot, right? I had a nurse who partied a lot and I ended up having to fire her. Know why I had to do that? 

Weezy: Cuz her uniform pants were so tight?

Dr. Tucker: No, Lil Wayne. It's because she didn't know her limits. She just kept getting wilder and wilder. What do you say to putting a cap on your reckless lifestyle? 

Weezy: No ceilings, mane... ha HA!

Dr. Tucker: That's sad to hear Weezy. Eventually, you'll have to learn that the human body has its limitations.

Weezy: I am not a human being.

Dr. Tucker: Well, that's just ridiculous. Whaddya say we
just do a full body scan? How will you be paying for this?