Tuesday, July 5, 2011

Bigotry in Wizardry

Started reading Deathly Hallows again. The beginning got me thinking... I've always kinda equated pure blood love to racial bigotry. Like, Lucius Malfoy would be someone who hates interracial marriage big time, like Jim Crow style. But where there are those in real life who are firmly against interracial relationships, but not against equal rights, there doesn't seem to be a middle ground in the wizarding world. It'd be like:

Wizard 1: Hey, my daughter's getting married to a muggle tomorrow.

Wizard 2: Oh, um, cool.

1: Um?

2: Oh nothing. So you're, y-you're cool with muggle marriage.

1: Yeah, why wouldn't I be?

2: Oh. No reason. I mean to each his own. I just wasn't raised that way.

1: Are you saying you don't approve of muggle mixings?

2: Well, I mean, not really. Wizards, muggles... we're different for a reason you know. Good for your daughter man, but I'd never do it.

1: Holy crap. You're a death eater.

2: What? No! No way. I just, you know... I'm traditional.

1: Expelliarmus! Help! HELP! This guys a &$#@^$# death eater!

2: Dude, no! Far from it. He Who Shall Not Be Named is evil, man.

1: Roll up your sleeve!

2: I'm not a death eater!

1: I said roll up your &$#@^$# sleeve!

2: There! Nothing! Are you happy?!

1: You must have magicked it away!

2: Look. I'm not a death eater. I just don't really agree with diluting the wizard bloodline. Now I'm gonna grab my wand slowly...

1: Expelliarmus!

2: Really? Expelliarmus? What are you, 12? Someone's definitely a Hufflepuff.

1: You just stay put. Don't move a muscle. I'm calling the NAAMB.

2: Just like a mudblood.

1: What was that?

2: Nothing. Look bro. Not every pure blood supporter is a death eater, okay.

1: Oh really? Name one who isn't.

2: Let's see, um... well there's Dawlish. No wait... saw his tat in the pool last summer. Yaxley.

1: Death eater.

2: No &$#@? Really?

1: Yeah dude.

2: Wow. Did not know that. Well there's Avery, but he might be.

1: Totally is.

2: Real talk. Real talk. Codswallop. Maybe you're right.

1: Dang skippy.

2: Wait til the guys in knockturn alley hear about this.

1: Dude. See? Only death eaters shop there.

2: What? No. They just have some cool stuff there that they don't have in diagon. You know, like darker stu... holy &$#@, all my friends are death eaters.

1: Man, you really aren't a death eater are you?

2: I'm really not. Wow. I can totally see why you thought that now.

1: Yeah. Sorry.

2: No no, I totally get it. Dang. I gotta go home and re-evaluate my lifestyle.

1: Hey man, why don't we go hit up three broomsticks, grab a few fire whiskeys and talk this out?

2: Y-yeah. Thanks man.