Wednesday, August 17, 2011

And The Winner Is... Everyone

Everybody likes movies, but not everybody likes the same kind of movie. Some folks enjoy critically acclaimed films while others prefer a special effects driven flick. Sadly, it seems like Hollywood rarely puts out a movie that satisfies both crowds. That's why we here at The Kids Are Aight are working hard to petition Hollywood for the following remakes and mash-ups that will help bring the two crowds together.

No Country For X-Men:
- Professor X comes to grips with his mortality, grows his hair out into a historically bad 'do, and travels the countryside in his wheelchair as a handi-capable hitman who kills anyone in his path with his mind... or that crazy bolt pistol thing.

Harry Potter and the Hurt Locker
- Forget Dumbledore's Army, Harry... you're needed in the United States army. Just don't try to use expelliarmus to disarm the bomb.

The Lion King's Speech
- It's the c-c-c-c-circle of l-l-l-l-life.

Rain (Spider)Man
- A man reconnects with his estranged brother, who just so happens to be the world's only autistic superhero. 
- "I'm an excellent spider."
- "Spidey senses are tingling, definitely tingling."

Casablanca 3D
- "Here's looking at you through special glasses, kid."
- "Of all the gin joints in all the towns in the world, she walks into... whoa it really looks like she's coming right at me!"
- "I think this is the beginning of a high-def, digitally-remastered friendship."